wishes

I wish I could have the best of both worlds. I am enjoying my times with sunshine but I'm missing my God a lot. I miss my quiet moments with Him. Help me,Lord. It's so hard to strike a balance when i know i am deliberately disobeying You. I don't know how to give this up yet and please don't take it away either. I know it's so easy for You to do :( but please, don't. Be with me though because I don't know how to live life without You anymore. Stay,my Savior.